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‘honey, you’re just like your dad.” dear god, perish the thought.

January 9, 2010 paternal grandfather was a bricklayer...

just finished a rather productive phone conversation with my formerly-estranged father.  i think it is a good idea that i am bridging the gap between us, but i still have major issues about it, naturally.  for example, those words came out of his mouth during our conversation, “honey, you’re just like your dad”.  I wanted to scream, “I am not!  fuck you!”  but resisted the temptation and just shook my head.  sigh.  as a wise friend would tell me, “he means well”, but how long can one ignore the fact that he knows NOTHING about me or my life but pretends to know everything?  i hate it when people talk to you like they know you, who you are, where you came from, then give you advice like they are this all-knowing sage.  i fucking hate that shit.

and this whole “he means well”…a pedophile means well and thinks they’re loving children as opposed to abusing them.  a parent thinks she means well when she beats the shit out of her 5 year old for spilling paint on the carpet, a misogynist thinks he means well when he tells a fellow faculty member she shouldn’t be proud of her chosen profession…just smile pretty for the cameras.  okay, okay–i know these are not totally related subjects, but my god, if i hear one more person use “he means well” as an excuse for bad behavior, i’m going to shit a brick.

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